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The Original Pure and Holy Marriage

Before sin and corruption entered the world, Adam was the Husband of Eve (Gen 3:6).  That shows us there is an uncorrupted form of marriage and an original holy design for marriage.  To understand this original uncorrupted form, we need to look at how it was first revealed leading up to its original ceremony, first declaration and explicit elaboration by Jesus.

  • A man was formed first (Gen 2:7)
  • The man required, and was made for, a 'suitable helper' (Gen 2:18)
  • A woman was then formed (Gen 2:21-22)
  • The woman was taken out of man (Gen 2:23)
  • God brought the singular woman to the singular man (Gen 2:23)
  • Together, one man and one woman formed a new family unit apart from mother and father (Gen 2:24)
  • There is no shame in this original uncorrupted design of marriage (Gen 2:25)
Familial Roles

Man was given the responsibility to lead and be the one held responsible to make decisions; but he was purposefully created not to be able to do it alone.  Woman was not made 'below' man or less valuable than man but was declared by God as a "suitable helper".  'Suitable' means "right or appropriate for a particular purpose".  Thus we see Woman as the only right and appropriate person to help the man achieve the family unit's purpose together.  Anyone different or thing different, and it is less appropriate and not right according to purpose and design in marriage.

For today, this means the man needs to be willing to accept the fact he can not best lead any family or marriage without a particular woman to help and support.  The woman needs to be willing to accept the fact God has ordained man to lead with her help.

Also read The Godly Wife | A Godly Husband

The First Ceremony

First, God brought Eve to Adam and introduced them.  Second, it was then declared about the uniqueness of the family unit, that marriage leaves behind the old family unit and joins to create a new family unit (Gen 2:24).  In the ceremony, there is an exchange from the old family to the new husband, and transfer of familial purpose from father to husband.  Finally, an open declaration of the newly created family unit and its purpose.

For today, this means a ceremony where the father releases his daughter and givers her to her new husband.  Then a witness declares the new family unit.  Of course there is strife and hard hearts of some fathers and mothers whom do not approve or do not want anything to do with the marriage.  But we need to look at what Jesus says about marriage as well.  Marriage is not defined by the feelings of mankind, but of what God brings together.

Jesus Elaborates 

Jesus also sheds more light on the original design of marriage.  The context of Matthew chapter 19 begins right-off-the-bat about issues related to marriage where marriage is the context.
  • Marriage is between a singular Man and a singular Woman (Matt 19:4)
  • God defined a pure marriage, not man's laws (Matt 19:6; Mark 10:9)
  • Divorce is not from God but from "hardness of your hearts" [sin] (Matt 19:8)
  • Sexual Immorality corrupts marriages [sin] (Matt 19:9)
  • Divorce and remarriages apart from the sexually immoral corrupted first marriage is adultery [sin] (Matt 19:9)
  • Not all people are made to, able to, or can be married (Matt 19:10-12)
  • Any man-made definition and label of 'marriage' out side of God's defined Man and Woman is just sexual immorality with a humanistic pseudo title of marriage (Matt 19:4-6).
Immediately following the discussion about marriage and divorce, Jesus follows up with addressing children.  Holy marriages benefit the children, corrupted marriages and divorces hurt the children.
  • After talking about divorce, Jesus prayed for the children (Matt 19:13)
  • Holy marriages help lead children to Jesus (Matt 19:14)
Also read The "Jesus didn't say it" Reasoning
Before Governments and Civil Laws

God officiated and ordained the first marriage before there were any governments and laws to validate it.  In this fact alone we see that a holy and pure marriage transcends laws and governments.  Government recognition and laws may help interpret how a marriage fits in a specific society; but the law and government itself does not define what is holy and pure.  It may create laws that change what is holy and pure into something that it sees fit, but that does not make it holy and pure by its definition.  The simple truth is that a holy and pure marriage was established and instituted prior to any law and government and is revealed in scripture.

Worldly Types of Pseudo-marriages

God alone defines what a true holy marriage is, this can not be stressed enough.  Man can invent their own kinds of 'marriage' but words (laws and cultural norms) alone do not make it a God ordained holy marriage.  Before God, these other types of 'marriages' are not what He recognizes as holy marriage and is just a different form of a corrupted invention from the sinful hearts of man.
  • A person married to an animal, or an inanimate object may be 'legal' in a society and may be given the title of 'married' and may be even given a 'certificate of marriage' but in the eyes of God it is not.  This has always been outside of what God has revealed about holy marriage and is explicitly condemned in scripture (Deuteronomy 27:21; Leviticus 18:23)
  • A person 'legally married' to a sibling, mother, father, or grandparent (incest) may be deemed 'legal' in a society, but before God it is not a holy marriage. Although it was used by God to populate and repopulate the earth, it was later deemed by God as no longer necessary and no longer acceptable (Leviticus 18:6-18). Thus making any incestuous marriage after His revelation of its unacceptable nature outside of God's will, unholy and sexually immoral.
  • A person 'legally married' to more than one individual (Polygamy) is no where explicitly condemned in scripture.  Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives.  God, speaking through the prophet Nathan, was willing to give David more wives (2 Samuel 12:8). So how should Christians understand Polygamous marriages?
    • Arguments against polygamy: We see Solomon having 700 wives but in 1 King 7:3-4 we see that they 'turned away his heart".  It is clear that the cause of Solomon's corrupted heart came from his many wives.  Also a monogamous marriage is the closest form of marriage to the very first and uncorrupted original form of marriage; making polygamy a variant from the original (Genesis 2:24).  In Deuteronomy 17:17-18 we see in scripture actually discourage from having too many wives.  Thus showing that having more than one wife and having too many wives may lead to hearts turning away from God.  This is continued in the New Testament and in the church.  Church leaders are expected to have only one wife (1 Timothy 3:2,12; Titus 1:6).  In Ephesians 5:22-33, Paul is assuming the husbands and wives are in a monogamous marriage.  Talking about Christ and His Bride (the church), is always singular; Christ's singular 'bride' the church.  It seems that polygamy was allowed to solve a problem.  The problem was protecting women in a society that had no other safety nets for survival.  Another solution through polygamy was faster re-population and nation generating.  But just like divorce and incest, and why it was 'allowed' (to solve a societal problem) it too was not part of God's original design for marriage. 
      • Having many wives increased problems in the home.
      • It is not described as part of the original design for marriage
      • It is a disqualification for kingship and church leadership
      • It solved a problem that is no longer a problem. Modern societies provide resources and opportunities for unmarried women, almost more so than married women.
      • It increases a risk of corruption of the spirit, much like incest increased a risk of corruption of the body (genetic deformities).  Risks that can be minimized in God's original monogamous form of marriage.
    • Arguments for polygamy:  The entire world is not all civilized and modernized. In societies who are more poorer and secluded cultures may still have the same problems that existed in Old Testament times.  Single women, in that region and culture, may be better off being a 8th wife than become a prostitute, being homeless, a slave, and facing starvation. If it is not outlawed by the society, and not explicitly condemned by God than it may actually serve a purpose in that culture that could be more beneficial than the alternative for women whom do not have a cultural support system outside of marriage.
    • Regardless of Polygamy being culturally acceptable or outlawed; Christians still obey what is explicitly started in scripture.  Church leaders can not have more than one wife and all Christians must obey the laws of the land (that do not contradict what God has commanded).  Currently, Polygamy is not legal in America and the modern world, thus Christians are called to obey that, as it does not contradict anything God has revealed on this matter.  What happens if modern society in the future legalizes polygamy? The standard for Church Leadership still holds true: "husband of one wife"
  • A person 'legally married' to another individual of the same-sex and gender is the current hot topic of our modern age.  This is actually very simple scripturally. From day 1 and all through the history of God's people, to the close of scripture, and for 1,910 years after the close of scripture; homosexuality is explicitly stated and known to be a behavior that is not acceptable to God and is caused by a sinful desire of the heart (Genesis 19:1-13; Leviticus 18:22; 20:13; Romans 1:26-27; 1 Corinthians 6:9). People call those who hold this belief all kinds of negative slanderous judgmental names, labeling them however they want; but they did not write what is explicitly stated in holy scripture.  Now struggling with unwanted same-sex attractions is an entirely different issue.  The first one is an attempt to justify something explicitly unacceptable to God; and the other is an admission of something unwanted and willingness to resist it because of what is explicitly made known in scripture. For the purpose of this article we will just apply the former.
    • Because the desire and behavior is explicitly revealed to be unacceptable to God, a marriage of the two would just be a continuation of the unaccepted desire and behavior.
    • All people are born sinners. As sin progresses, it manifests in different ways for different people.  Homosexuality is a progressive manifestation of the sin that is in all our hearts naturally (Romans 1:24-27). All sin is equally offensive before God but all sin can be overcome through God as well. The struggling with unwanted same-sex attractions opens the door for victory over it.  Victory offers the possibility for a marriage that is in line of God's original design and family unit.
  • A person whom 'legally' changed their gender from male to female, or female to male, through medical procedures and hormone therapy (transgenderism); then 'legally marries' a person of their 'opposite' (but same as birth) gender is a soundly complicated issue but again, is quite simple.  First God makes everyone either male or female (Genesis 1:27).  At birth, the doctor knows exactly what people are born as (sexual genetic deformities = 0.001%).  The idea that someone is a female trapped in a males body is unbiblical to start with.  Gender fluidity is also a biological and biblical problem.  God does not make a mistake in our bodily formations (deformities are not mistakes, they are opportunities for God's glory).  If someone is born a male, God did not oopsy and mean for that person to actually be a female. Psalm 139 address the Gender Identity Disorder issue.  Second, transvestism conflicts with the explicit statement in Deuteronomy 22:5 and attempting to change ones gender and sex does not negate that God did not make a mistake at birth in regards to the gender.   
 Also read Don't Judge Me | God's Truths are Not a Matter of Opinions | Your Feelings Do Not Determine Truth | How "Love is Love" is Unloving. | Born This Way | Homosexuality

 The Supreme Court and Society Disagrees

This is not a valid justification for anything.  Slavery was supported by the Supreme court until recent history and The Holocaust was supported by German citizens.  There is legal slavery in Saudi Arabia right now; America would find it highly offensive and reminiscent of American slavery.  Using human thought as justification for behavior and desires will always lead away from God due to the natural state of man's heart.  In the middle east, most countries, punish homosexuality, even some with the death penalty... today.  Using a socialites high court and social norms as a justification is hypocritical and attempts to glorify the ideals of sinful man.  People can either justify behaviors and desires with ever changing societal courts and norms or be justified by what God has declared and made known for all eternity.

Also read SCOTUS and God


God has made known his original holy and pure design for marriage in this world:  One man, One woman, ceremoniously joined together and made publicly known as becoming a unique and new single family unit where the Husband is the incomplete head of the home and the Wife is the complete helper of the home.  Anything outside of this, even made legal by any court or society, is not justified by God nor accepted by God because God has already made know what he finds holy and pure in regards to marriage.  

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